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marriage | Deacon Allen Tatara Catholic Speaker

marriage | Deacon Allen Tatara Catholic Speaker

On the Inside; On the Outside


 
Jul 17 2019
Love0

Removing the Veil

Posted by | Everyday Life | No Comments

A veil is an article of clothing that is intended to cover some part of the head or face. Veiling has a long history in European, Asian, and African societies and is prominent in many forms of Judaism, Islam, and Christianity. Veiling continues to play a role today especially in wedding customs where it’s used to hide the face of the bride so that the groom would not see her face until after the ceremony. Then the new groom would lift the veil hiding the bride’s face and kiss her.

Sometimes it feels like you and I are walking around with veils covering our faces. We go through the motions of life not clearly seeing due to the many temptations of our modern culture like power, wealth, success, adulation, etc. – everything in relation to “me.” When we wear this veil, we become disoriented, disillusioned and lost, and we cannot see where we are heading.

St. Paul tells us that a veil lies over our hearts, but when we turn to the Lord, that veil is removed. It reminds me of that beautiful image we often see of St. Anthony of Padua holding the infant Jesus in his arms. When our veils are removed, we can experience the power of Jesus in our lives. When we gaze upon the face of Christ, we will find joy, happiness, comfort, peace, love, and the true light that shines out of darkness.

It’s time to remove the veil that hides us from seeing Jesus. Let us put aside the darkness that the world draws us into and allow the joy that comes from living with Christ permeate our lives for all to see. Let the unveiling begin!

Aug 23 2018
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Save the Date!

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My son and his fiance came to visit us last weekend and they were joyfully telling us of how their wedding plans are progressing and how “ahead of schedule” they were in a number of things. They also stated that the “save the date” cards were ready to be mailed. This is something that Stephanie and I didn’t have to do when we got married. Back then, we just sent out our wedding invitation and that was it. Nowadays, it’s proper etiquette to notify people ahead of time so that they have time to prepare and put it on their calendars.

In today’s Gospel (MT 22:1-14), Jesus tells us about how the kingdom of heaven is like a wedding feast, and how each of us has received a “save the date” announcement. Each of us is invited to participate, but we often don’t respond. Sometimes we have too much to do, or it’s not high on our list of priorities, or we may not even care to celebrate with this particular group of people. We often find an excuse just so we don’t have to go to the party.

But what if we received a “save the date” announcement from Jesus? What if we had plenty of time to prepare? What if we were warned? Perhaps if we knew the date of our entrance into heaven, we’d better prepare ourselves and perhaps live life differently.

This is the message for us today. We have been invited. We have been notified. We have been warned. Entrance into God’s kingdom is not automatic. We need to take action and respond. This means that we need to take responsibility for how we are living. Are we treating others with dignity and respect? Do we forgive others instead of holding grudges? Do we love unselfishly and put the needs of others before our own? Do we love our enemies as we do ourselves?

It’s time we start living the way that God intended us to live – by truly loving one another, helping one another and being a witness of Christ to everyone we encounter.

The venue is ready, the party is planned, and the table is set. But are we really prepared to “save the date” and accept God’s invitation to partake in the heavenly feast? Let’s hope so, for our eternal life depends on it!

Aug 09 2018
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New Covenant with God

Posted by | Discipleship | No Comments

One of my many diaconal duties at our parish is to meet with our engaged couples. I, along with my wife Stephanie, help prepare them as they journey toward marriage. One of the things that I always tell them is that marriage is not a contract, but a covenant. A covenant is an unbreakable bond, something that our couples need to understand as they prepare for a lifetime of commitment to one another in marriage.

In our readings today, we hear of God making a new covenant with his people. It’s a covenant so deep and important that it is placed and written on our hearts. It’s a covenant so intense that we are only made aware of it because God has revealed it to us. And much like our engaged couples discover, it’s an unbreakable bond. No matter what we do or what we say, God is with us and forgives us. God does this because He loves us so intensely that we actually become one with each other. We are bonded in our love, and we are never left alone.

Back in college, I helped form a group of Catholic musicians and singers that sang at our campus Masses and events. When I was researching a name for our group, I consulted the Bible. Today’s reading from Jeremiah really hit home (Jeremiah 31:31-34). After a group vote, we decided to call ourselves “New Covenant.” (I even wrote a song about it!)

Each of us is called to have a personal relationship with God, so we are able to not only recognize God in our daily lives but to also spread Christ to those we encounter. This is the new covenant, and it is with us every single day. We just need to look inside our hearts (it’s written right there) so we can experience and share it with others.

Let us rejoice in the fact that we are loved by our Creator, our heavenly Father, who hands over the keys to the kingdom to those who will accept them. We are bound together in an unbreakable relationship of love. He is our God; we are His people. As it is written in the verse of my song:

He lives in you, and you live in Him, and that covenant will never end.

Oct 20 2016
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Made Out of Love to Love

Posted by | Emotions/Feelings | No Comments

20131008_180315I am always telling my wife Stephanie how much I love her. I tell her that my love for her burns with a fiery passion, that she completes me and makes me a better person, and that she fills me with joy and happiness every single day. And I often tell her that my love for her is so deep that she truly doesn’t know how much that I love her.

When I read today’s reading from St. Paul (Ephesians 3:14-21), I immediately thought not only of how much I love my wife, but also how much God loves us. And the similarities are quite amazing.

  1. Our relationships are rooted and grounded in love. We were made in the image and likeness of God. We were made out of love to love. God created us out of love and wants us to love others the way he loves us – unconditionally. That’s the same type of love that each of us longs for in any relationship.
  2. We can never fully comprehend the breadth and length and height and depth of that love. God’s love for us simply surpasses all knowledge. Just like when I tell Stephanie that she doesn’t know how much I love her, we cannot grasp how much God loves us – despite all our flaws. I often think that if I love my wife as much as I do, how much more does God love me? I cannot imagine and it simply blows my mind.
  3. We are filled with all the fullness of God. In other words, God completes us. Every longing is satisfied when we place ourselves in His divine presence. We are filled with joy and happiness and our hearts burn with a passion when we spend time with our God who loves us so much and desires to be with us (and is with us) every minute of every day. When we spend time with God in prayer, we become whole, complete, and one with our heavenly Father. That is a fullness that can never be emptied.

It’s no coincidence that God compares the love he has for us as the love that a bridegroom has for his bride: filled to the brim and forever overflowing, abundant with joy and happiness, growing deeper with each passing day, and always rooted and grounded in unconditional love.

Jun 25 2015
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Building a Life on the Rock

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What kind of foundation are we building on? In today’s gospel (Matthew 7:21-29), Jesus wasn’t talking about building an actual house, but about building a life – a life that is meaningful – a life worth living. We could certainly apply this teaching to marriages and families too.

When we’re building a life, we want it to be a life that we can look back on at the end of it without any regrets. When we’re building a family, we want that family to be stable, strong, and full of joy and love. If we want to build a life or a household that will last, that will stand, that will make a difference; we first need to understand what Jesus means when he talks about storms. Read More

Sep 18 2014
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Prayer of Spouses for Each Other

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Prayer of Spouses for Each Other

Lord Jesus, grant that my spouse and I may have a true and understanding love for each other. Grant that we may both be filled with faith and trust. Give us the grace to live with each other in peace and harmony.

May we always bear with one another’s weaknesses and grow from each others strengths. Help us to forgive one another’s failings and grant us patience, kindness, cheerfulness and the spirit of placing the well-being of one another ahead of one’s self.

May the love that brought us together grow and mature with each passing year. Bring us both ever closer to you through our love for each other. Let our love grown to perfection. Amen.