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hope | Deacon Allen Tatara Catholic Speaker - Part 4

hope | Deacon Allen Tatara Catholic Speaker - Part 4

On the Inside; On the Outside


 

I Am Worthy

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“Lord, do not trouble yourself, for I am not worthy to have you enter under my roof. Therefore, I did not consider myself worthy to come to you…” ~Luke 7:6-7

 

Photo courtesy of OdysseyOnline.com

Here I am, Lord. I stand before you a sinner. As I look at my life, I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve used Your name in ways that I shouldn’t have. I’ve lied and cheated so it would benefit me. I’ve put my needs, wants and desires before the needs, wants and desires of others. There were so many times when I talked behind other’s backs, treated my friends and even family unfairly, and judged others unjustly. And let’s not forget the number of times I shouted angrily at other people on the road because they weren’t driving like I think they should be driving. How many times have I ignored the poor and needy on the street corner, or spent my money on something that I really didn’t need instead of helping out someone who was in real need?

Sometimes, I look in the mirror and don’t even recognize the person who is staring back at me. I can’t help but to wonder what happened, why I feel so empty, so abandoned, so unworthy.

And then, I stop what I am doing and simply sit in Your presence. For when I am with You in prayer, I realize how blessed I am. When I am with You, things become less cloudy, less stressful, less painful, and more peaceful.

When I am with You, I remember that I matter and that I am the most precious thing in Your eyes. I am reminded that I have a purpose and a calling. I may not always know what you want me to do, but I trust that it will be revealed to me in time. When I am with You, I realize that I am Your child, and that I am loved for who I am.

Lord, if it’s not too much trouble, I ask You to be with me and speak to me. Give me the strength to freely come to you.

I am ready. I am here. I am listening. I am worthy!

Being a Disciple is like being a Parent

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Last weekend, our oldest son got married. It was a beautiful day and everything went as well as could be expected. It was a wonderful time filled with happiness, family and a really good party.

But as we were waiting for the wedding to begin, my mind started reminiscing as I happily watched our son in the final moments before the ceremony. I started thinking about his early birth into this world (three months early to be exact) and how Stephanie and I watched him overcome the many obstacles as he grew. I started thinking about all of the good times we had when he was a young boy and all of the activities that we did together. I started remembering all of the joy and sadness that we encountered along the way of watching him grow into the young man that he is today. I also thought about how unprepared I was to be a parent.

Raising children is not easy. We do the best we can with the knowledge gained from our own upbringing and experiences. Sometimes it’s a struggle. But we do the best we can do and pray that our choices and decisions will benefit our children for years to come.

In our Gospel today (Matthew 10:7-15), Jesus informs us of what we need to do in our mission to be his disciples. It’s similar to parenting. Sometimes, things fall right into place. Other times, we have no clue as what to do. The job is not always easy and sometimes we have doubts. So we need to trust and remember that God, our Father, is always with us guiding us and showing us the way – just like any parent would do.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; and lean not upon your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your path. ~Proverbs 3:5-6

Give in to Love, Not Anger

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Anybody have difficulty with anger or controlling your anger, maybe even leading you to behavior that you’re not exactly proud of? Write my name down on that list; better yet, put it at the very top. If you want to see me NOT at my best, make me angry. If you’re with me in feeling that way, there’s a powerful message for us in today’s Gospel (Matthew 5:20-26).

Jesus is talking about anger, holding onto grudges, hurt and perhaps even hate. I assume that most of us do not hate someone. However, I am sure that all of us have dealt with anger, grudges, hurt and jealousy at various times in our lives. These are emotions that we all have. They are part of being human. Do we always like these emotions? Most likely not! Yet, these emotions that we may consider negative are as much part of us as are the positive emotions.

As human beings, we experience both ends of the spectrum of positive and negative emotions. Today Jesus is talking to his disciples about the choice we all have. We can choose to focus on the emotions that we know are positive and make us feel good: love, gratitude, appreciation, hope, understanding and faith Or we can choose to focus on the emotions that disturb and upset us: anger, jealousy, hate, etc.

The reality is that our emotions are neither “bad” nor “good.” They simply are! The key is learning how to deal with all of these emotions. When we hang onto those disturbing emotions, it can lead to feelings that block love and therefore block God in our lives. Jesus teaches us this about anger so that we can not only learn to forgive others and love as God loves us, but to also learn how to humble ourselves and ask for forgiveness. If we are truly to be the men and women that we are called to be, then we must learn how to give in to love, rather than anger.

We all know what Jesus is asking us to do. It’s just not easy! So we must pray for the grace, strength and wisdom to overcome these love-blocking emotions. God will give us the grace that we need, but it’s up to us. So what will we choose today?

It’s Not About You

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A while back, I was having the worst day ever. At one point, I decided that I needed to take a long walk or I was going to explode. I needed to vent, and I thought that taking my venting to God was what I needed to do. So I spent my entire walking journey complaining and whining to God in prayer.

I let everything out, and I didn’t hold back. (It was not one of my prouder moments.) At the end of my walk, I suddenly felt this phrase fall upon my heart: it’s not about you.

This was certainly one of those moments where I knew that God was speaking to me. It was just so out of nowhere that I knew it wasn’t something that I could have conjured up. God was reminding me that all my problems, concerns, worries, frustrations, and issues were all centered around me. Everything was about me!

In Scripture, whether we are looking at the Visitation, Annunciation, the Wedding in Cana or other events, Mary says very little, but her words are packed full of meaning. The one thing that underscores all of her communication is that it’s not about her – it’s about Him.

Her only desire was to be known as a lowly servant – a handmaid, if you will – of God. She wanted nothing more and would settle for nothing less that total surrender to Him.

What difficulties are you facing in your life? What conflicts do you find in your workplace, your family, or among your friends? Could it be that God is using these as a gentle reminder that it’s not about you and cause you to grow and experience the transforming power of God in your life?

Let us pray that “It’s not about you” rolls through our minds daily. Let us feel the invitation of God’s Spirit to change our attitudes and behaviors so that we become less self-focused and begin to see things as God sees them.

As Clear as Day

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For those of you who haven’t heard, I recently had a bad case of influenza. If that wasn’t bad enough, it arrived day before Holy Thursday, and it proceeded to “do me in” for at least two weeks.

One thing you need to understand is that in all the years of my existence on this planet, I had never missed attending parts of the entire Triduum and Easter Sunday. (And for a deacon, this feat is nearly impossible.) But that’s what happened. I was bed-ridden through the holiest days of the year.

I struggled with mini-bouts of anger for being sick and missing church. This really troubled me and I even felt guilty for being at home. I was going through the various stages of mourning, and I even broke out in tears at one point.

So I began to pray and placed myself into the passion story. I tried to connect my sickness to what Jesus had experienced. Of course, there is no comparison, but it helped me reframe my situation and gave me a powerful spiritual experience that got me through that difficult time. It’s hard to explain what happened, but I will always treasure the moment.

In today’s Gospel (John 16:16-20), we are reminded that we may weep and mourn at times, even when the world may be rejoicing. We may grieve over things that we experience, even things out of our control. But we must trust and believe that Jesus is always with us along the way. He desires to be in relationship with us. He loves us so much that he laid down his life for you and me. He didn’t take the easy way out, but had faith in his Father’s will.

We may not always see the Lord in all that we do, but he is always there with us. All we have to do is have a little faith and simply trust in the Lord. Then, in a little while, we will see clearly. And that will be more than enough to turn our grief into unimaginable joy.

All Souls’ Day

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Today we remember those who have passed from this life with faith, hope and trust in the promise of eternal life. Life is a gift from God and nothing that God gives or does is ever wasted. And let us always remember that each of us is a beloved child of God.

Our lives are a reflection of God and his love. Those who have passed whom we remember today somehow reflected that love. Sadness, sorrow, and grief may fill us today, but that is a reminder of their presence and love in our lives.

While we still mourn, we are confident that our loved ones are enjoying the peace, comfort and joy of eternal life. All Souls’ Day is a great reminder for each of us that we are given the gift of life.

So we pray today for our deceased parents, spouses, children, relatives, and friends. We want them to be capable of receiving the full bounty of God’s love; so we pray for them in our daily prayers.

All Souls’ Day touches us personally. Yes, it is a day of mixed emotions. It is our day to remember, to miss, but also to be joyful. We also reflect on our own existence. Each of us is a soul…a soul on a journey. We are still walking on that journey to become all that we were meant to be – a child of God enjoying eternal life with him.

“I will not reject anyone who comes to me,” the Lord said in our gospel today (John 6:37-40). We trust in the God who loves us – to care for us and our loved ones in life and in death. And so we pray, “May the souls of the faithful departed through the mercy of God rest in peace. Amen.”

Fear or Faith?

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More than 19 million Americans have this, and it causes difficulty in some area of their lives. What is it? It’s a phobia. A phobia is an excessive and irrational fear reaction. If you have a phobia, you may experience a deep sense of dread or panic when you encounter the source of your fear, whether it is of a certain place, situation, or object. Unlike general anxiety disorders, a phobia is usually connected to something specific. Here are a few of the most common phobias:

  • Altophobia: Fear of heights.
  • Arachnophobia: Fear of spiders.
  • Claustrophobia: Fear of confined spaces.
  • Arachibutyrophobia: Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth.
  • Theophobia: fear of God.
  • Ecclesiophobia: Fear of church.
  • Homilophobia: Fear of homilies. (Maybe even Deacon Allen’s homilies!)
  • Testophobia: Fear of taking tests.
  • Phalacrophobia: Fear of becoming bald.
  • Chaetophobia: Fear of hair (other people’s hair).
  • Xenophobia: Fear of the unknown.
  • Ephebiphobia: Fear of youth (teenagers).

There is an old proverb that goes something like this:

Fear less, hope more; eat less, chew more; whine less, breathe more; talk less, say more; hate less, love more; and all good things will be yours.

Notice, “Fear less” is at the top of that list of what needs to be done if all good things are to be ours. Moreover, “Fear less” was high on Jesus’ list of things you need to do in order to experience wholeness of life.

Jesus wants you to know beyond all doubt that you and I are important to God; that God wants to be in a relationship with us. You may turn on the busy signal if you wish, but God never will do that. We can always count on God’s constant care for us.

Each one of us is called to go out and serve those in need, the most vulnerable in our society – and that can be scary. We are often afraid to speak the truth, to stand up for what is right, or afraid of those who might try to hurt us. We might be afraid to try new things, or meet new people who are different than us. But Jesus promises us that God is in control: “Not one sparrow falls to the ground without your Father’s knowledge.” Jesus reassures us of the value that God places on us. You and I are worth more than many sparrows; and we are also precious in God’s sight. With God by our side, we have nothing to fear.

And Now, I Wait

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I am one of the disciples of Jesus. I’m ashamed to admit it, but I am in hiding because of the events that have recently taken place. After what had happened to Jesus, I feared for the worst. All I could think about was could this possibly happen to me as well? I was terrified, and I fled for my life. Here I thought that my faith was strong enough to withstand anything; but man, was I wrong. I abandoned my Lord, and I feel awful. He told us to trust in him, but I didn’t. But can you blame me? I’ve never been so frightened in my entire life.

And now, I wait.

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Worth the Wait

Posted by | Everyday Life | No Comments

Last Sunday, we experienced something that hasn’t happened in quite some time; something that may not happen again anytime soon. Our three young adult sons were all home at the same time! Due to work schedules, college schedules, and the fact that each resides in a different state, it is becoming increasingly difficult to have all three at home together. So we took this opportunity to plan an early family Christmas celebration.

As we were watching the weather reports for the impending snow storm, we were very hopeful that all would be able to travel home safely. So we patiently waited for their coming. Despite snowy roads, all arrived safe and sound and we had a very enjoyable day together as a family. It was certainly worth the wait!

Today’s readings instill within us a deep and passionate desire for God. Just as we were anxious for our boys to come home, so must we be anxious for Jesus’ coming with that same desire and passion. But often times we find our patience being challenged during our waiting.

We are challenged in so many ways, and we often find that Advent (that season of hoping and waiting) is not always an easy thing to live out. In our world, we face the threat of war, terrorism, and violence. In our society, there is a lack of respect for life and for the dignity of all people. In our own lives, we struggle with family issues, work stress, illness, and trying to do the right thing. Our patience often runs thin when we are forced to wait for an answer.

But there is some good news: regardless of our hardships, Advent cultivates hope for each of us to carry on. We know as a people of faith that Jesus is always with us; both in our joys and in our sufferings. We are never left alone.

In these remaining days of Advent, let us prepare the way of the Lord. No one is greater, and no one is more worthy of our praise. Jesus is coming, and he is certainly worth the wait!