Have you ever caught yourself in the act of judging others? It could be while driving, in the grocery store, at school, at work, or even in church. We all have this inner tendency to judge; it’s human nature. Read More
feelings | Deacon Allen Tatara Catholic Speaker
On the Inside; On the Outside
5 Ways to Survive in Tragic Times
Posted by Deacon Allen | Emotions/Feelings, Everyday Life | No CommentsThe past couple of weeks have hit me pretty hard, and I imagine that I’m not alone.
In light of ‘The Academy Award’ incident that has been all over the news and social media, we should be reminded of this beautiful and timely quote from Scripture:
Read More
Anybody have difficulty with anger or controlling your anger, maybe even leading you to behavior that you’re not exactly proud of? Write my name down on that list; better yet, put it at the very top. If you want to see me NOT at my best, make me angry. If you’re with me in feeling that way, there’s a powerful message for us in today’s Gospel (Matthew 5:20-26).
Jesus is talking about anger, holding onto grudges, hurt and perhaps even hate. I assume that most of us do not hate someone. However, I am sure that all of us have dealt with anger, grudges, hurt and jealousy at various times in our lives. These are emotions that we all have. They are part of being human. Do we always like these emotions? Most likely not! Yet, these emotions that we may consider negative are as much part of us as are the positive emotions.
As human beings, we experience both ends of the spectrum of positive and negative emotions. Today Jesus is talking to his disciples about the choice we all have. We can choose to focus on the emotions that we know are positive and make us feel good: love, gratitude, appreciation, hope, understanding and faith Or we can choose to focus on the emotions that disturb and upset us: anger, jealousy, hate, etc.
The reality is that our emotions are neither “bad” nor “good.” They simply are! The key is learning how to deal with all of these emotions. When we hang onto those disturbing emotions, it can lead to feelings that block love and therefore block God in our lives. Jesus teaches us this about anger so that we can not only learn to forgive others and love as God loves us, but to also learn how to humble ourselves and ask for forgiveness. If we are truly to be the men and women that we are called to be, then we must learn how to give in to love, rather than anger.
We all know what Jesus is asking us to do. It’s just not easy! So we must pray for the grace, strength and wisdom to overcome these love-blocking emotions. God will give us the grace that we need, but it’s up to us. So what will we choose today?
What does it take to be great? According to the Lord, it takes humility. “The Lord is gracious and merciful; slow to anger, and of great kindness.”(Ps 145:8) Let’s dive into these four attributes.
The Lord is gracious. The Christmas story is powerful because it is gracious. The Creator of the Universe, the One who is not like us, became one of us so that He could be one with us. This story is retold in many different ways. I think back to the movie, “Avatar.” A man traveled to another world. He became one of them. He fell in love with them. He was willing to die for them. He saved them from the evil ones. He was betrayed and nearly killed by his own. Sound familiar? There is no more gracious God then the Lord who became one of us.
The Lord is merciful. What does mercy mean? It means getting filthy, downright dirty, for another. It means sticking your hand into something slimy and gooey to help someone. For example: a bus driver who stopped to rescue two families from a burning house – and went on to finish his route; a grad student who lost her leg in an earthquake in Haiti, then returned to the country to build a school; a woman who donated her kidney to a Facebook friend. The Lord defined what mercy truly means: to do something beautiful, unexpectedly. The Lord is merciful because he gets right into it!
The Lord is slow to anger. We know what this means. We have all experienced it. We are all recipients of it. We live, breath, smile and give a big sigh of relief because the Lord turned the other cheek. Who would tell us the truth without fear of being rejected, rebuked or ridiculed? Only the Lord does not fear being hurt by our feelings. The Lord is slow to anger because He is rich in kindness.
The Lord is great in kindness. He gives what we need. He takes what we give. The difference between the two is immense. He gives us His Son. What do we give Him? For this reason, the Lord is great in kindness.
Let us imitate the Lord by living these four great attributes. Our God is amazing, full of humility and love. There is none greater!
The Gift
If one cannot grow, one cannot learn
the meaning of life; the gift of return.
If one cannot fly like a bird of a feather,
feelings held captive and held in forever.
If one cannot reach for a star in the sky,
dreams are left shattered and the future will die.
If one cannot say what rests on the mind,
the two doors of speech will be closed to the blind.
If one cannot feel for the strength in the air,
nearness is coldness, darkness, and fear.
For if one cannot love, one cannot live,
and grow in the Spirit and possess what you give.
(I wrote this poem on February 2, 1984.)
Stress-Control Strategies for Coping in a Crisis
Posted by Deacon Allen | Emotions/Feelings | One CommentI was reading through my healthcare provider’s newsletter not too long ago when I came across an article from Arleen Fitzgerald, L.I.C.S.W., on how to cope in a crisis. There was some really good information in there that I wanted to share as well as add some additional input on the subject of finding some key strategies to help us cope when dealing with sorrow, anxiety, and anger in trying times. Read More
