As I began settling in on my annual retreat, I slowly started the process of withdrawal from the busyness of my life to the peace, silence, and tranquility of this spiritual place. Here, I will completely turn myself over to the Lord, hoping and praying that I will be spiritually refreshed and renewed.
It’s no mystery to what has been going on in my life for almost one year now – and it mostly revolves around challenges at my day job. (Church activities has its own set of challenges, but the majority of my major struggles have been job-related.) In all my years of employment, I cannot recall anything like what I’ve gone through. I’ve been challenged on multiple fronts, and it’s been really hard on me. Have I learned a lot during this trying period? Absolutely! My only wish is that it could have happened over a longer course of time – not all at once. Maybe I could have handled things better or reacted differently. But what happened, happened – and I had to deal with it the best that I could.
During my morning prayer, I read this excerpt from the writings of St. Rose of Lima:
“Let all men know that grace comes after tribulation. Let them know that without the burden of afflictions, it is impossible to reach the height of grace. Let them know that the gifts of grace increase as the struggles increase. Let men take care not to stray and be deceived. This is the only true stairway to paradise, and without the cross they can find no road to climb to heaven.”
When I read this, I felt something touch me in my heart. I cannot accurately describe the feeling, but I did experience a sense of calm, almost knowing that because of what I have been going through for such an extended period of time, it is ultimately growing me stronger in faith. I now fully understand that I was not alone during my trials. When I was carrying my crosses, Jesus was with me all along, and I was never left to carry these by myself. Without the cross, there is no resurrection.
May our crosses always remind us to look for the light when we are in darkness so that we too can rise to new life in Christ. Amen.
Not only that, but we even boast of our afflictions, knowing that affliction produces endurance, and endurance, proven character, and proven character, hope, and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out into our hearts through the holy Spirit that has been given to us. ~Romans 5:3-5
Everything is going to be just fine. Find out how.
You’ve been in my prayers, Allen. God bless you. Thank you for always being there for us.