My mind continues to be flooded with all sorts of things, feelings, and thoughts. At times, I feel like I am riding on a never-ending carousel ride that continues to spin and turn, never stopping for a chance to get off. These random thoughts just keep coming at all times, day and night, and it just never stops.
Many things continue to weigh heavily on my mind and heart. I’m still experiencing worry and confusion from my day job and what the future will hold with all the changes taking place. There’s still an anxiety from serving in a new parish, meeting new people, learning new systems, and ultimately trying to figure out what will happen next. And there is still the issue over the death of my mother – being so preoccupied with all the finite details that I haven’t even had the time to properly process and mourn her passing.
“Calgon, take me away!” (Hopefully someone will remember this very old commercial.)
If only a relaxing bath would ease my burdens. But maybe the answer is right there in that advertising message. Let me try to reframe this.
Instead of carrying all of this (let’s call it the dirt and grime of life) on my mind and heart, what if I took the time to bathe in the Lord? What would happen if I chose to place my burdens at the feet of Jesus and asked him to help and guide me through my struggles? Would that help me ease my burdens?
Then I rediscovered this beautiful prayer from Thomas Merton:
My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this, you will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it. Therefore, I will trust you always. Thought I may seem lost in the shadow of death, I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone. Amen.
May this prayer always remind us that if we trust (or bathe) in the Lord, we will find true peace, happiness, and a wholeness beyond anything that our minds can comprehend.
The Lord is my strength and my shield, in whom my heart trusts. I am helped, so my heart rejoices; with my song I praise him. ~Psalm 28:7
If you have trust issues, than you really need to read this.
