For those of you who haven’t heard, I recently had a bad case of influenza. If that wasn’t bad enough, it arrived day before Holy Thursday, and it proceeded to “do me in” for at least two weeks.
One thing you need to understand is that in all the years of my existence on this planet, I had never missed attending parts of the entire Triduum and Easter Sunday. (And for a deacon, this feat is nearly impossible.) But that’s what happened. I was bed-ridden through the holiest days of the year.
I struggled with mini-bouts of anger for being sick and missing church. This really troubled me and I even felt guilty for being at home. I was going through the various stages of mourning, and I even broke out in tears at one point.
So I began to pray and placed myself into the passion story. I tried to connect my sickness to what Jesus had experienced. Of course, there is no comparison, but it helped me reframe my situation and gave me a powerful spiritual experience that got me through that difficult time. It’s hard to explain what happened, but I will always treasure the moment.
In today’s Gospel (John 16:16-20), we are reminded that we may weep and mourn at times, even when the world may be rejoicing. We may grieve over things that we experience, even things out of our control. But we must trust and believe that Jesus is always with us along the way. He desires to be in relationship with us. He loves us so much that he laid down his life for you and me. He didn’t take the easy way out, but had faith in his Father’s will.
We may not always see the Lord in all that we do, but he is always there with us. All we have to do is have a little faith and simply trust in the Lord. Then, in a little while, we will see clearly. And that will be more than enough to turn our grief into unimaginable joy.
